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November, 2001

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Michael Lewis

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Stop the Madness

First, there was SALT I to limit strategic nuclear weapons. Then SALT II carrying on the effort to protect the world from destruction. But after the last two campaign seasons, another clear and present danger has emerged that threatens to overwhelm our neighborhoods. That's right, its the onslaught of the:

MONSTER LAWN SIGNS!!!!!!!

In the last round of federal elections, we began to see them. Eight feet wide by four feet high, they are twice the size of legal campaign signs. Thirty-two square feet of campaign slogan and candidate, right on residential lawns. Signs so big that rebar (that old campaign standby) couldn't hold them up. These babies need wood framing suitable for a fishhouse or modest garage.

Oh sure, there were only a few at first, and more a novelty than a serious threat. But this year, a school board candidate thought these lawn billboards were just the ticket to break out of the pack. Her campaign put up over twenty of these behemoths. The City's effort at enforcement was ineffectual. Worse, another candidate in the primary had begun putting her face on her signs. Just imagination 32 square feet of politician grinning at you for months from your neighbor's yard. We could quickly be in a world of serious hurt.

There is only one answer to this dire threat. Immediately beginning the Sign Area Limitation Talks (SALT III) is the only way to stop this senseless escalation and preserve our way of life. Can't we give 16 square feet a chance?

Michael Lewis
D-Zine Editor/Ward 3 DFL Chair
  
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